A Beginner’s Guide to managing the change process

How to manage the change process inside

Some time ago, I talked to a friend about the akashic records reading I had done for her. We talked about managing the change process that the world around us is going through and impacts us. Especially this year, we have had to get used to many situations that seemed to happen, but they are all the outcomes of a change process taking place on a deeper level. Even how difficult these situations are in our third-dimensional reality, let’s try to rise above it from our soul’s perspective and wonder: “What if what’s happening is exactly what we need, right now?”

No limitations

As there is no time limitation in soul reality, there is no past and no future. There is only right now in which things happen. Everything is here, right now, even the things that we can only experience from the limitation of a time frame in which we live. Our brains are pretty limited; that is why we “invented” the past and the present to filter out unnecessary information.

When we decided to take on this life’s experience, we already knew what kind of life we were choosing. We chose it because we wanted it. After all, the life you’re living is an experience you never wanted to miss out on.

How to manage the change process inside

Transformation is scary shit

There is a transformation going on. Transformation, a.k.a. change, is scary. This is because we, as humans, have built many blocks and restrictions to prevent us from living our full potential. We hide in fears, in stories, and through habits. But we have lost the consciousness to understand what’s going on at a higher level. Because of that, we can only see (and feel) that we are threatened in our existence as we know it from this life’s perspective. As things change rapidly, we need to manage the change process inside of us. It scares the shit out of us, so we have a couple of choices. You

  • fight and scream that it’s a scandal and post your conspiracy theories on Facebook;
  • freeze and get stuck and can’t take action anymore;
  • flee and hide because you’re overwhelmed by everything around you.

Examples of coping patterns

I see examples of all three patterns around me. I see the fighters who manage the change by telling us not to get the new vaccine because there is a chip inside it. They use Facebook to scream their truths at us and that they’re right and we’re wrong. What they forget is that to get your right, other people need to agree with you. Since there’s always someone to be found somewhere who disagrees with them, many insults are thrown to and fro. It breaks up family bonds and important friendships.

I also see more people than ever getting stuck over the last few years. They get burned out and are incapable of doing their job for a long time and sometimes never really recover from it. The number of people who develop depression or a psychiatric illness or people with serious diseases. Why is that? Is it our environment, or are there other causes?

What if this was exactly what you wanted?

But let me ask the question again: “What if all this outrage, stuckness, and overwhelm is exactly what you hoped to find in this life so that you could have a deep experience to help you grow on a soul level?” If that was your objective, then boy, you’ve chosen the right life! Just suppose all this life crap isn’t for nothing. Thinking about it brings huge insight for me. If I came here to learn about some human suffering, well, then my life was a huge success twenty years ago already. All that crap I struggled with suddenly makes sense and becomes less heavy. How about your life?

These are exciting times. What if you, as a soul, wanted to be present in this weird reality to see a transformation take place for humanity? Imagine yourself in your energy state sitting on that cloud, wondering if this life was the best you could get rather than “that other one.” How does it feel that you said YES wholeheartedly to the plan for your life? It gives me a good feeling that I said YES on all levels.

To manage the change process is hard

What I’m not saying is that you chose the circumstances. You chose the feelings it brought up and the opportunity to learn how to rise from it like a phoenix from the ashed. You did not choose how. It was the experience and the lesson of it.

I know that in some people’s lives, challenging things happen. People experience loved ones who die, having a difficult illness, or struggle with mental illness or poverty. Bad things happen. But what I want you to do is to look at it from a soul’s perspective. I believe that souls don’t want to experience exact situations. They want to experience certain feelings and want to learn how to overcome them in a soulful way.

As a soul, ready to incarnate, you were not held back by the blocks and restrictions you now experience. There was no need to drink too much, be a workaholic, or ignore your truth. As a soul, you want to know how it feels to experience crappy life circumstances. Hence, you go on an internship to grow and develop from overcoming difficult situations. You’re an intern now.

Understand that you are growing and developing hugely right now – if you let yourself. That’s why you need to manage the change process inside yourself. What you’re experiencing is what you’ll remember in your next lives or realities. It is okay to struggle with stuff and make mistakes repeatedly. Just be patient with yourself. You’re learning – you’ll get it someday. I promise.

How to manage the change process inside yourself

But how do you manage that change process? Here are some steps to work on it.


Amidst this crazy world, take a step back, and observe what is happening around you.

Do this as if you’re a Netflix documentary maker working on your newest project to inform and educate millions of people. Look at the people in the footage you’re shooting as if you’ve never met them and listen to their story as if you’ve never heard it before.

We tend to label everything we see and hear because it is our way of ordering our environment. It is a very human way to stick an emotional label to everything because it helps us cope with situations. We need to because we want to survive as long as possible. We need to know what is dangerous or stupid. But the thing is that the emotional label also stops us from experiencing life fully. We ward off the experience.

So, the next time you talk to people who usually upset you, do it differently. I want you to see them and listen to them without any prejudice. Really listen to them.


Now that you’ve gotten all the footage for your Netflix documentary, you go home and upload it to your computer to look at it. You see the stories and interviews on your screen. Now it’s time to reflect on it. Ask yourself how the footage makes you feel. Does it make you feel angry, scared, insecure?

Once you know how it makes you feel, then reflect on the reaction it brings up in your body. What do you want to do? Call them and tell them how wrong they are? Spit in their face? Sue them? Hit them? Embrace them? Love them? Solace them? Do you want to walk away, flee? Not to ever talk to them ever again?

Notice where in your body you can feel it.


What often happens is that you bite down on the issues in your life. You bite so hard that it becomes an obsession. Your husband is an asshole, your boss is a moron, and your neighbor is an idiot. You think so much about what they do and say that you can’t release yourself from this bond anymore. All you can do is see what you don’t have instead of what you do have. It all sucks, right?

Now, force yourself to look at the situation from the most favorable point of view and ask yourself if everything was great, how would your situation be? Would you have a loving relationship with your husband, who would be super supportive of you? Would you have a great boss who would help you grow in your career and give you a promotion (what job would he give you?) And how would it be if you could chat over the hedge with your neighbor and invite them over for a drink to discuss in an open way how you’d connect your gardens to make a big park in which you’d work together to make it awesome?

The million dollar question

The million dollar question that needs to follow these daydreams is, “how do these daydreams make you feel?” Create affirmations out of these feelings. Notice that these affirmations focus on feelings, not on what you do or have.

  • I am so happy and feel so loved by my husband. He supports me in my endeavors to become a great […]. It makes me feel so proud of myself now that I’ve published my first children’s book and writing my second one. Writing is what I love doing.
  • I feel so proud of how my career is progressing now that I’m working with […]. I feel excited about the promotion he has given me to become […] to develop myself toward becoming a […], I feel secure because he believes in me, and it helps me trust myself.
  • I had such a fun day with […]. We decided to remove the hedge between our properties to create this beautiful park behind our homes. We trust each other fully and have so much fun choosing beautiful plants for our garden.

Repeat this every day, preferably out loud.


Now that you know your preferred feelings, imagine which actions would bring you closer to these feelings. If you’d be the person in that affirmation, what would you do? Biting down on old behavior or habits would not create a better future; it needs different actions. It is vital to do things differently now. Make this a conscious and, if needed, courageous action. If you keep on responding to pain, you will not change your situation.

Jolanda Bolt
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