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You do not find the best diet, the best diet finds you

If you search for the best diet in Google, the search engine generates more than 7.5 million options for you in 0.52 seconds. You may have even found me that way because I used the best diet as keywords for this blog.

But what is the best diet, really? I mean for you. How will you decide which one to choose, which one to discard, and which one to have as a plan B? There are so many people out there who want to sell you a diet! Whether it is a book, a program, or a supplement, they all think their solution is the best diet. It is as simple as that!

  • Their diet will help you reach goal weight fast!
  • Their diet will help you eat the healthiest food (with recipes!)
  • And it will be their diet that will allow you to have cookies and cheat days (hmm, yes please!)

How to find the best diet

It is so hard to make up your mind, so what do you do? You listen around and find out what others are talking about – on Facebook, on Instagram. You walk into bookstores and look at the presentation table for health-related books until you see one book or one program (whether in-store or online) that keeps coming up over and over again. To be honest, I did the same thing. I listened to others to find out what I should do because I had lost confidence that I would ever reach goal weight.

One thing that all those best diets have in common is that you need to eat less than you burn, how will you lose weight any other way, right? If you eat more than you burn, you put on pounds, and here in the Netherlands, we have a saying Every pound goes through the mouth.

best diet Pinterest

Macros and calories

But how high is your metabolism really? Are you the average Jane who maintains her weight at 2000 calories a day? I’m not! I do not have a metabolism like that. When I eat 2000 calories every day, I gain weight as fast as lightning!

And what about macros? Do you follow the high-fat, low-carb thing? Are you a high-protein person? Why? Why have you chosen what you chose to work with? Because they told you to? If there is one thing that makes people diss each other in weight loss-land, it is about what to eat. I have seen so much discussion or even fighting between nutritionists in the past few years that it is not even funny anymore. Like, a good conversation about why’s and how’s is okay, but dissing a colleague because they advise their clients to eat 5% more protein or fat? No, that is not my way of having a good discussion. And while everybody tries to make a living in the weight loss industry, some people do this in a way that does not align with me.

The truth about the best diet

The truth is that it really does not matter which diet you follow. You need to follow the diet that feels best in your body – the diet plan that creates calm and balance sustainably. So, whether or not you want to implement an intermitted fasting strategy or rather follow a six small meals a day plan, it is all right, as long as your body lets go of the weight and it does not cause squirrelly thoughts and habits. It is these habits that make you gain back the weight.

Dr. Frank Sacks of the Harvard School of Public Health found out that the discussion about the best diet is meaningless. All diet types performed excellently as long as the subjects ate less than they burned. The only thing that did jump out of his research was that people who got coaching did way better than people who just got instruction and sent home, only to be weighed again by the time the research period ended.

Your body’s different needs

What I  quickly found out when I became a weight loss coach was that virtually everybody can read a few pages of what to eat and what not to eat. It is not about understanding what we put out there, it is about the behavioral change, that is so hard.

Besides that, you also need to have the guts to change your plan, away from what your coach tells you to eat and build your own program. This asks for trust in your own power and judgment. Especially when weight loss takes a long time, your body needs to have some change now and then. That is why I do not believe in eating the same thing over and over. It may be easy for you, but it lulls your body to sleep and turns your metabolism down. I believe, from my own experience, that you need to listen to your body and become aware of what it needs throughout the year.

This means that you need to keep noticing how your body reacts to what you eat. Besides that, you also need to listen to how your body’s needs change throughout the year. In Spring you will need different food than in Winter. If you live in a cold or cool environment, you will need different food than when you live in the tropics.

How I can help you

Then who are we nutritionists on the other side of the world to tell you what to eat to lose weight? Who are we to say to you that what you are doing is wrong if you do not lose weight? The only way we can help you is to help you find out what triggers you to overeat and eat more than you burn. Besides that, we can help you to implement the habits that need to become automatic, so you can repeat them over and over again without lulling your body to sleep.

The only way we can tell you what to do is when you give away your power to us and become the victim of your circumstances. It is time to take back control and create a collaboration with a weight loss coach because you can feel what is right for your body!

What is right for me may not be right for you. Your body is a wise and knowledgeable instrument, and you must start grounding your experience. You need to listen to it and trust it that is wise enough to tell you what to do. This is not something you build overnight, but it comes through experimenting, making mistakes and going back onto the original program and start all over again until you tweak it to something that makes your body and soul hum.

Sabotage

If you find it hard to follow a list of instructions and keep on sabotaging yourself into a weight gain, then you must find out what triggers you to cross the lines in the sand that were described as rules in your food plan. Why do you break your promises to yourself all the time? What is there in your life that makes weight loss so hard to just –excuse my French- follow the fucking plan?

It is the emotional and mental stuff that clogs up your clear channel with your body. The cloudy water and stormy skies keep messing up your days, and you need to find out why you keep eating your stuff away. It is not because your body does not object – it does. It is your heart, your mind, and your soul that are also opposing to what you are doing because you apparently do not want to listen to what they are telling you. The only way that makes you pay attention is when you see the scale go up. You create your own weight gain by not listening to what your mind and soul are telling you.

Stop that eternal quest for the best diet

So, while you are looking for the best diet in the world, you can stop the eternal quest. Just look back over what worked best for you in the past and gave you the best experience of freedom. Just choose one. There is no perfect diet, you know. Research shows that there is no difference.

You need to tweak your focus – from searching outside of you to looking within because that is where the answer to what your best diet is. As long as you think that you only need to focus on what you eat and do not align your strategy to what your real problem is (your big fat why of overeating), you will probably lose weight and gain it all back again over and over again. This is because your inner world needs to be heard when it is sad or hurt – even if that sadness and hurt started years ago. It will stand in your way if you do not address it. I am sorry to be such a party pooper if you ended up on this page to find the best diet, but this is just what it is.

Weight loss is not about what you eat, but how you look at yourself and how you align your actions with your real needs.

Questions?

If you have any questions, please let me know.

Photo by Daria Shevtsova from Pexels

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How to know if your weight scale is a big fat liar

Your weight scale is a great tool to measure how much weight you’ve lost? I mean: your weight isn’t showing anything else than the force of gravity on you, which may be defined as the mass times the acceleration of gravity. Or something. I was never any good at this in school, so correct me if I’m wrong, I’m not even going to Google this.

But this gravity thing isn’t all that reliable when you weigh yourself very often. Every time you get these different numbers. One thing is real, though: down is right, up is terrible.

The question is, though: does that devil of a thing show you the right number all the time? I dare to say that it doesn’t. Your weight scale can be a big fat liar, so now and then.

In whatever way you use your weight scale, please don’t let it define if you’re good enough, because whatever a scale does, it doesn’t say if you worked hard enough at reaching your goal or if you’ve lost enough this week.

Enough is such a subjective word. We load it with sub-conscious stories about who you are and if you’re good enough as a person.

HOW OFTEN SHOULD YOU USE YOUR WEIGHT SCALE?

In my opinion, you shouldn’t weigh in more often than once a week when you’re on a weight loss program. I will explain why, later on in this blog. But when you are just starting maintenance after you’ve lost a lot of weight and wanted to keep it off, your weight scale might be a good friend.

Depending on how you label the results, the weight scale gives you; I might also advise you to not even weigh in at all while on a weight loss program. There are so many other ways to define if you’re losing weight that it is ridiculous to trust that one tool so much. Too often, I see emotional eating or disordered eating in connection with daily weighing. When you’re obsessed with the number on the scale will not help you to come back to who you are and what you want to create in your life.

To help you, here are eight moments when you’d better decide that your weight scale is a big fat liar.

scale

RIGHT AFTER YOU’VE HAD DINNER

So, you only had dinner, and you’re 4 pounds heavier? Huh? How’s that possible? This weight gain is often not about added body fat, which takes so much longer to create. What is possible is that your blood volume has grown because you ate and drank during the day. Without noticing, this can cause quite a lot of weight. Calculate the weight of all those cups of water you drank plus the weight of all the meals you ate. It is probably more than the weight gain you now see reflected between your toes.

It often takes 24 hours or more for your body to decide what to do with the food you ate. So eating outside of your rule book doesn’t mean you’ll gain weight. Eating outside of your rule book several times a week does.

Know that it takes at least 3600 kcal above your metabolical maintenance level to gain a pound of body fat. That is a lot, and it will often be reached by eating more than you should on a daily level than in one meal. So it is the daily habit that you check, not the one ‘over the top meal with friends.’

DURING THE FIRST FEW WEEKS OF A NEW DIET OR TRAINING PROGRAM

Don’t you love it, those first two weeks of a diet? You lose weight fast, and you think it will always be like that. Sorry to burst your bubble, but you’re most probably losing water weight and muscle tissue. Losing body fat doesn’t go that fast. Yeah… bummer.

After a week or two, your body will settle in the new regime and will build back the muscles if your diet is healthy enough, and if you eat enough.

Most people also become more active when starting a new diet by going to the gym (again) or starting a work out regime outside. So what your body lost in the first few weeks because your body had to get used to getting less food, is now being rebuilt again. This aspect may cause your body to gain weight a bit. Building muscle is hard work.

Your body needs food, water, and rest to do its job. So at first, your weight scale might show a rise because your body holds on to things first before it starts to build muscles. Does that tell you that you didn’t do your best? Hell no, you did you best and more than that. Give that body of yours a bit of slack… it is working hard for you.

To know if you’re losing fat mass, you’ll need a particular weight scale that sends a small current through your body to see what kind of tissue it finds in its way. The current will move through the water quickly, but it takes longer to move through fat tissue. Use a high-quality weight scale that has this feature and use the impedance feature only once a month or even once every three months to see a difference. All other weekly weigh-ins, you only register your weight. Nothing more.

Doing an impedance measurement more often shows the up and down of water in and out of your muscles only and its effect it has on fat mass. Trust me; my personal experience is talking here. It will drive you crazy, trying to understand how you can suddenly gain 2 pounds of fat mass in a week while you didn’t do anything wrong.

IMMEDIATELY AFTER A WORKOUT OR A SAUNA VISIT

I’ve seen them, people who step on the scale in the gym or the sauna. A weight scale in a gym is only real information if you want to know how much sweat you lost and how much water you need to drink again to stay healthy.

The same with stepping on a weight scale in a sauna – you’ve spent all day in the spa, spent time in the sauna, and when you go back to the dressing room, there might be a scale. Don’t use it to see if you’ve lost weight. Only use it to see if you need to drink up.

IMMEDIATELY AFTER YOU DRANK A LOT OF WATER

There are days that even before I hit my office chair, I’ve already drunk a liter of water (4 cups). I have a darling of a husband who brings tea in the morning. I drink another cup of tea at breakfast, maybe even a cup of coffee if I’m in the mood, plus I drink two big glasses to take my vitamins. So my moment to weigh myself is right after I wake up and after I’ve gone to the bathroom. Any later than that, it is no use anymore.

Choose your moment of weighing on the same day of the week, same time, after bathroom visit and preferably without drinking or eating anything before. That will give you the most trusted result.

JUST BEFORE BED

This aspect connects with the first reason why your weight scale is a big fat liar. There is another aspect added to it. Weighing before bed is nothing more than punishment because you probably overate during the day. Why would you weigh yourself if you already know that you’ll be heavier because of what you ate?

If you do this, notice the inner conversation you start with yourself because of the number you see. Also, monitor your quality of sleep because I can’t imagine you’ll have a rested night after being upset with yourself. A better strategy would also be to skip the weigh-in the next morning because you know for sure you’ll see a weight gain. If you’re prone to negative self-talk than weighing in after overeating is not your strategy.

AFTER YOU’VE HAD A BABY

After you’ve had a baby, you often think you’ve lost quite a lot of weight, right? Baby + placenta + amniotic fluid = YESSSS!!! Well, it’s a yes when you’ve weighed just before you went into labor but a big fat no if you compare it to the weight you had before you got pregnant.

Your body will have to change its hormonal balance (again), and it takes time to change it. Going on a diet is a bad idea because changing hormone balances are very, very hard work for your body, and it will need lots of high-quality carbs, proteins, and fats to do that. Enjoy the new baby, follow the food instructions you get from your post-natal coach, and you’ll get there in the end. Don’t go crazy over all the “I had a baby two months ago and look at my abs already” images on Pinterest. That’s social media, not real life…

Take care of yourself to also adjust emotionally and mentally to be a new mom. It is okay to do that. And much healthier for you and your baby.

AROUND YOUR PERIOD

Let me start with the good news: in the two weeks before your period, your metabolism is a tiny bit higher because of the hormonal changes that lead up to your period. Don’t start your happy dance just yet because this is only 4%, so put-back-the-chocolate-bar-now.

Still, this rise in metabolism could be an explanation of why women struggle with eating just before their period. They feel hungrier than the weeks before, and it is hard to say no to something tasty when it comes along.

Right before your period, your weight starts to rise because your body needs water to make this whole process possible. You’ll lose it quite quickly as soon as it has begun.

Your best strategy is to skip your weigh-in when your period is just about to start because of the added water weight.

MY ADVICE ABOUT USING A WEIGHT SCALE WHEN LOSING WEIGHT:

  • Do not weigh yourself more often than once a week.
  • Understand that your scale is pretty stupid and only shows a gravity number and nothing more
  • Always use the scale in the same spot because even that can give a difference in measurement.
  • Stop weighing in and ask your partner or a good friend to hide your scale when you show signs of emotional attachment to your scale.
  • Understand that weight loss is about losing fat mass, not weight.

 

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Mindset change for weight loss: how to create one

Have you ever been aware that you needed to change your mindset for weight? You’ve probably done it more often than you were aware. Look back to the last few days of the last year and the first few of this year: you probably thought about losing weight again. Maybe you set some goals and maybe you even started a new diet. But if you haven’t done this yet, that’s okay. This blog gives you four aspects to not forget when you create a mindset for weight loss.

For a mindset change you only have to say yes or no

Take a serious look at yourself and grade it with a number between 1 and 10 how you feel physically, emotionally, psychologically and spiritually. Let that feeling enter your whole being and feel if this is something you want to accept for now and for later. The answer isn’t any harder than yes or no.

I always say that No is also an answer. No means that you’re not ready yet. Ready to make a commitment, ready to make changes. Accept it for now but do think about what this decision means to you in your future. It means that you accept your weight right now, without feeling bad about it. It also means that you can’t whine about the details: your clothes, your body, your energy level or maybe even your pain level.

On the other hand, your life may be in turmoil right now, and you can’t also handle a whole lifestyle change or weight loss diet. Remember that just a little bit of added self-care (go to be early my mom used to say) will help you to feel better so you can handle the other “stuff” in your life. It’s got to start somewhere. In a way, you’re never ready.

A no comes from your mind; a yes comes as a whisper from your heart; because your heart knows. You do not have to create that mindset change anymore; it is ready. You are ready.

Free download: Stick To Your Weight Loss Diet With Ease

Evaluate your current lifestyle

Take a look at your current lifestyle and evaluate how it serves you. Are you eating healthy(-ish)? Are you drinking enough water? Do you also go to bed at a decent time? Are you managing your stress by deep breathing, mindfulness practice or meditation?

I don’t expect you to be one of those people you see on Instagram, drinking their green smoothies every day and “feeling so radiant.” I don’t expect you to be the best at managing your stress or always prepare your food at home because that’s where that’s where it is easiest. You are human.

But I do expect you to become conscious of how your lifestyle influences your body, your feelings, your mind and your Higher Self. How does it really feel or do you know deep down something’s got to change?

I want you to open your eyes and be honest. Is this you at your best? If not, you do not have to create that mindset change; it is ready. You are ready.

Mindset for weight loss: how to create one

Are you going in the right direction?

To know if you’re going in the right direction with your physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual health will ask you to feel if you’re going in the right direction. It is something you know inside.

It means that you do not just follow any guru (not even me LOL) who tells you to eat something because it is so healthy. Your body needs different food than mine. So do not follow any self-proclaimed guru if the instructions they give do not FEEL RIGHT.

The advice may be really good (in theory), but if it makes you feel cold or tired, change it. If it makes you gain weight, change it. If it makes you feel low about yourself, change it. Your body knows exactly what it needs. Deliver it!

If you know that you’re not going in the right direction, you don’t have to create that mindset change anymore; it is ready. You’re ready.

Check in with your Saboteur

So, now that I’ve told you not to listen to any wise food person anymore and I’ve also talked you out of consulting me to help you get well again, I also want you to check in with your Saboteur. Your Saboteur is that ugly little voice inside that rather keeps you living small than making the steps towards a life full of bliss and freedom of stubborn weight and binge eating. Sometimes it is just easier not feeling well, not being strong, not being happy, healthy and free. Sometimes it is just easier to keep eating.

The question is: does it makes you happy?

If not, you do not have to create that mindset change anymore; it is ready. You’re ready.

It is as simple as that. Don’t overthink it anymore. You can change today. Or on January 1st.

Still not sure if you have the right mindset to start working on yourself? I can help you to make a decision. I have several mentoring programs, short and long, but they all start with a free nutritional freedom call. Book one now and we’ll just talk about how your mindset is keeping you from reaching your dream.

<3

Jolanda

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